So I will be moving back to NY in a few weeks. I now vacillate between multiple extreme emotions on a daily basis. I go from pure joy: Chris on a daily basis... forever... all mine, waking up together, going to bed together, cooking together, fighting together (in person! So we can actually make up with hugs!!), apartment all to ourselves... privacy, creating our life together... puppies, decorating, finding shared hobbies... It's blissful to think about. Really.
To hopeful: wanting to spend more time with my family... hoping that we'll all get along after not having spent very much time together since I left for college over 8 years ago... wanting to find fun stuff to share with each of them on a regular basis... hoping to finally have a chance to soak in and make sense and make peace with the new family situation that has occurred since I was actually living in NY over 8 years ago...
To anxious: about moving in with a boy... about living with someone I've spent most of our relationship talking over the phone with... about starting internship and hoping I fit in and do a good job and find that this is truly the perfect fit I anticipate... about leaving school (where I have comfortably lived my life for the past 20 years) and entering the real world... about living in a new place (I know it's not exactly new, but I've gotten very used to living in my nice little bubble here)...
To sad: leaving good friends that I've made here... leaving my program, which has become a nice, safe little place for me... leaving the sunny weather... leaving the dog parks... leaving several restaurants I've become quite attached to.
It's weird. I thought moving would the happiest time of my life. And in some ways it is, but it's also filled with a variety of other emotions I wasn't quite expecting...
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